We hear all kinds of birth stories from the women around us. When I was pregnant, I was an elementary school teacher and my colleagues were always quick to give me advice. Foods I should avoid, what labor was going to be like, and which OB I should use were among the topics I received the most advice in.
“My sister just LOVED her OB and told me that’s who I should use for my pregnancy. However, I just don’t get a good vibe from him/her. Can I change my OB or midwife?”
I’ve worked with almost all of the providers/groups/midwives in our area, and I can honestly tell you that there isn’t a “best” or “perfect” provider for all women. Each woman I work with has a unique set of factors that go into their decision for who will be caring for them throughout their pregnancy and birth.
However, a few times a year, at least one of my clients starts feeling uncomfortable with who they are using. It might be that they are feeling pressured into a certain test or procedure, or perhaps their vision for their baby’s birth might be a bit different than what their OB/Midwife handles births.
Here are a few tips that might help if you find yourself in this position:
- Gather some information at your next appointment. Is it one provider in a group of doctors/midwives that you are uncomfortable with, or is it the entire practice? What would happen if you go into labor when that doctor/midwife was on-call? You can switch providers at any time in your pregnancy!
- Ask questions and discuss your concerns. Let the provider know that you are uncomfortable with their views and ask why they feel the way they do. For example, if your doctor/midwife wants you to be induced at 40 weeks and that concerns you, ask why they feel that induction is best for you. Are they willing to “let” you go longer under any circumstance? What happens if you provided that doctor/midwife with some of the research you’ve gathered? One thing I always recommend my clients do is to share their birth plan/birth wish list with their provider BEFORE they are in labor (preferably around 36 weeks). Discussing the birth plan will help you get a good idea of what your provider will be like in labor.
- Bring someone with you to the appointment and get their feedback. Does your partner/spouse feel the same way? PLEASE NOTE: While I value spouse/partner opinions, it is ULTIMATELY your birth experience and you should…
- Follow your gut. Mothers have wonderful intuition and instincts that should not be ignored. If you feel that this is not the place for you, change providers as soon as you can.
- Consider your values. If you want a more natural, less intervention based birth, you might be better suited with a midwife. If you want someone to medically manage your labor, you might be better suited to an OB. Interview multiple OB’s and midwives until you find a practice that suits you. This is also a great time to ask your doula about your local options. In the Des Moines area, we have a huge spectrum of providers available to women in both hospital and out-of-hospital births.
- Switch as soon as you can. This will help you build a relationship with your new provider and get you the prenatal care best suited to you.
Here is a link to some of my favorite questions you can start asking at your appointments: Having a Baby? 10 Questions to ask (from Coalition for Improving Maternity Services CIMS)
Did YOU switch providers in pregnancy? What was your experience like? What other tips can you share?
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