Does it matter if your Postpartum Support comes from someone like baby’s grandmas or postpartum doula? Our short answer is possibly. Support for a new family comes in many different styles and formats, and as postpartum doulas, we’re always thrilled to be a part of the new baby team, especially when grandma is a part of the team too. Here’s how we’re both similar and different.
A quick disclaimer: We know that some family dynamics don’t include a grandma/grandparents for a variety of reasons. If generational support is not available for you, we totally understand and would love to be your postpartum support team. We wanted to share this information for families who are trying to decide what/how much support they may need from family and local professional postpartum doulas.
Evidence Based Information
Perhaps the biggest difference we see between doulas and grandmas is that grandmas aren’t always up-to-date on things like “Back to Sleep”, car seat safety, breastfeeding/bottle feeding information, and other topics. We’ve learned a lot about baby safety in the last few decades and grandmothers are often surprised to learn things have changed. Having a postpartum doula on your baby team assures that you’re getting the most up-to-date, evidence-based information.
Mom’s Physical Recovery
New moms are often very vulnerable when it comes to things like their physical recovery (especially if there’s been a Cesarean Birth) and learning to breastfeed. If grandma is someone who is comforting to a new mom, she is the right person to be there! If grandma brings some stress to the new mom, perhaps she could fill another role in supporting the new family. Postpartum doulas are experts in mom’s physical recovery and are happy to help provide tips to make that recovery as smooth as possible.
Newborn Care
We’ve supported families where grandparents are providing lots of newborn care like first baths, diaper changes, and calming a crying baby. Other grandparents are less comfortable with those daily tasks and a postpartum doula may be a better fit for support. Or perhaps the postpartum doula could provide some learning opportunities for grandparents too!
Home Care
Does the grandma fit more into the “visitor” role or the “helper” role? What we mean by this is what she would prefer to do while she’s in the home. Would she prefer to snuggle baby, take photos, and dote on the new baby? Or would she prefer to work on laundry, make a meal, and do diaper changes? Neither role is right or wrong, but it may be helpful to also have a postpartum doula there to fill in the gaps.
Love
No one can love a new family quite like a grandma can! While we absolutely care for the new parents and babies we work with, that will never be the same as family. Grandmas win this category, hands down!
If you’d like to learn more about what type of support we offer, whether it’s alongside a fantastic grandmother or not, please send us a message! katie@theiowababylady.com
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