I recently read that when you’ve been awake for over 24 hours, it’s equivalent to a BAC of 0.10. I found that interesting as it is something fairly common for most doulas, myself included, to be awake for over 24 hours if we are attending an overnight birth. I may not be with the family for 24 hours in a row (though it has happened!), but there are still times when babies decide to arrive in the night and I don’t have the opportunity to go to bed until the next day.

Many women go in to labor in the middle of the night when they are most relaxed and feel the safest. This is not only hard on moms and dads, but their doula too! I pride myself on being a really great doula while I’m with my clients, but I’ll be honest, as soon as a I leave, my exhaustion shows up. After being awake for almost 36 hours at a recent birth, I think I had lost some of my rational thinking skills and the following situation occurred the hospital parking garage.

It was about 5am when I was leaving a birth. I loaded up my doula backpack and grabbed my keys. It was still dark outside and the parking garage had very dim lighting. I quickly got in my car while watching my surroundings. (I love Des Moines, but any person has the right to be a little scared as they are alone in a parking garage. Thanks Hollywood.)

There I sat, alone in the middle of the parking garage, ready to attack.

There I sat, alone in the middle of the parking garage, ready to attack.

Just as I started my car, I remembered watching an Oprah story about how bad guys will hide in the trunks of vans to attack their victims. It’s also important to remember that I am no longer rationally thinking about things as you read this next part.

I decided that the best solution to see if there was a man hiding in the trunk of my Traverse was to quickly slam on my breaks and send him flying towards the front seat. You know, sneak attack style. I placed my left hand on the steering wheel, then turned around in my driver’s seat to watch for my attacker to come flying into view.

Well, what I didn’t expect was that as I was turning around and slamming on the breaks, I would also lay into the car horn. It was so loud in the parking garage that it echoed for a few seconds. At this point I didn’t know it was my horn and I totally panicked. I scared myself so bad that I *may* have even wet my pants a little bit in this process (mommy bladder + tons of caffeine = trouble). As you may have guessed, there was no one in my trunk. So there I sat in the middle of the lane, completely stopped, honking my own horn. Realizing that I was indeed safe, I headed towards home.

Can you imagine what a security video of this incident would show? A woman all by herself, slams on the breaks, honks the horn, and then drives off? Crazy.

For families who hire doulas: While we know that our work is never as tiring and exhausting as labor, it’s still really hard on us physically and emotionally too. When I’ve been awake for this long, I’m not only missing time with my family, but I have to go home and sleep which means missing them even more. My passion for serving moms overrides this, but this is one factor that goes into doulas charging a professional fee.

For doulas reading this: I learned my lesson–next time I’m calling in my back up so I can get a quick rest!